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Joke of the Day
"How many times can you celebrate a 29th birthday before people catch on? -asking for a friend"
Next Joke
"TIFU by falling asleep on the john at noon. I meant Job. I fell asleep on the Job. :D :D"
"boys need to work on keeping their Instagram up to date with good pics. I can't show my mom some pic of a fish you caught 120 weeks ago"
"What do you call a sick extraterrestrial? An ailin' alien."
"I got mugged by 6 dwarves... .... not Happy."
"What did the leper tell the prostitute? You can keep the tip"
"So this guy who suffers from premature ejaculation comes out of no where"
"Life is like a sewer... What you get out of it depends on what you put into it. (Shamelessly ripped from An Evening Wasted with Tom Lehrer)"
"ISIS is not Global Warming... I heard Pratt & Whitney were United tonight. God bless you both!"
"I wasn't going to get a brain transplant... But then I changed my mind."