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Joke of the Day

"So this guy who suffers from premature ejaculation comes out of no where"

"Went to dinner with my girlfriend tonight and got called a pedophile because I'm 30 and she's 19. Totally ruined our 10th anniversary."

"The first time I spent the night at my girlfriend's house, her father would not let us sleep together... ...which is a shame because he was very attractive."

"One day, scientists will build a very intelligent supercomputer. ""Is there a god?"", they ask. *** ""There is one now."""

"If A Tree Falls Down In The Woods... But no one is around to hear it. Does a hipster still buy the album?"

"The meeting with Kim Davis isn't the only thing on his U.S. trip that Pope Francis wanted to keep secret... The engine in his Fiat was a Volkswagen diesel."

"Why is Jesus black? Because he's our father, and still hasn't come back yet...."

"What does an Italian cow say when he gets an extra delivery of hay to the barn? That's amorehay!"

"What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad? One trains the mind the other minds the train."

"Who is the coolest guy in the hospital? The Ultrasound guy."