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Joke of the Day

"My new girlfriend really takes my breath away.... She's inflatable."

"Alright! Everyone that got a DM containing a map to my treehouse, meet there in 15 mins. Those who didn't, maybe consider being nicer to me."

"Why do skateboarders make lousy plumbers? Because they only use half pipes."

"""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ""Itself"" ~History"

"Why aren't there any black people in the Air Force? They're still afraid of hangars."

"What did Bill Cosby call Donald Trump? A rookie."

"When I'm in a conference room all by myself I like to pretend I'm having a very important meeting with chairs about chair shit."

"I was taken by aliens! I couldn't get away, I don't speak Spanish!"

"A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar..... The bartender says "" Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here""."

"What sort of crime is it if a neckbeard commits murder? A fedoral offense."