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Joke of the Day

"I was taken by aliens! I couldn't get away, I don't speak Spanish!"

"I told my friend that I grew up Catholic. She asked if I had ever been molested. I'm still pretty butt hurt about that"

"""Whose line is it anyway?"" -generous cocaine party guests"

"[OC] How does Gandhi measure passive resistance? In oooooohms."

">be 17 >miss [(For those who don't get it)](http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2012/4/4/1333548711318/Battleship-board-game-001.jpg)"

"I thought I spotted superman twice yesterday. Turns out it was just a bird and a plane. -Dwight York"

"What did the court jester call the balding crown prince? The Heir Apparent with no Hair Apparent."

"What's a blind mans worst fear ? A prius"

"Using a hot dog bun as a wallet"

"....Hey...uh...hey. Reddit. Yeah, you Reddit.....what do ducks eat? **QUACKERS** **LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL--STARTS CHOKING ON OWN HUMOR--**"