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Joke of the Day

"I was just unfollowed by a guy with 10,349 tweets & 38 followers...I'm thinking that's the same guy at the park that talks to all the pigeons"

"Mexican jokes and black jokes are pretty much the same. Once you hear Juan you've heard Jamal."

"How do you shut up a deaf person? Punch them in the hands."

"What did the casket say to the sick casket? Are you coffin?"

"Why did the joke on /r/jokes get removed? [removed]"

"What do you call a bear with no teeth?? A gummy bear!!!"

"What do you call someone who tops Darth Vader during sex? An Invader."

"How many Freudian Analysts does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2. One to screw it in and the other to hold the penis---ladder!! I meant ladder..."

"Now accepting applications for a new best friend. Must be willing to let me put my fingers in your mouth. No Mexicans. No skanks. Por favor."

"I'm still not sure how the church expects me to do all that kneeling and standing and praying on just that one little wafer they feed you."