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Joke of the Day

"How many Freudian Analysts does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2. One to screw it in and the other to hold the penis---ladder!! I meant ladder..."

"You can teach a man to lead a fish to water but you can't make him drink a horse"

"Zencrafters.... Total enlightenment, in about an hour."

"I've never had a beard before this one and I didnt like it at first. But its really growing on me."

"Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost."

"What Should I Do Today? Eat A Bomb?Nuke A Toaster?Ride Nyan Cat Into Space?Bomb ISIS?Oh Theres Just So Much You Can Do!"

"You guys like jokes I hear, I got a joke for you. Women's rights...."

"Why can't R2D2 walk? Because he has MS-DOS"

"Two newborns are having a conversation... 1: You look worried. What's wrong? 2: It's about my Dad. 1: What about him? 2: I saw him with Mom last night. I think he's stealing my milk."

"What does spinach and butt sex have in common? When they are forced on you as a child you resent them as an adult"