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Joke of the Day

"What's the best part about showering with a 7 year old girl? You slick their hair back and you've got a 7 year old boy."

"I got a new job crushing cans... It's so depressing..."

"Why are the best psychoanalysists Asian? Because they grew up listening to Pink Freud."

"Sometimes I'll order things online & pay for handling but not shipping. I don't want the product; I just want them to move it around a bit."

"I treat my wife the same way I treat a bottle of ketchup... I always take the top off, flip it upside down, and hit it has hard as I can."

"If the conversation gets too serious take your pants off."

"TIFU by posting on the wrong subreddit hehe"

"Do you want to hear a joke about Pizza? Nah it's too cheesy"

"You can tell a movie is going to be funny if one is the characters is shrugging in the poster. Because shrugging people will do anything!"

"'Icy-Hot' is too weak for Chuck Norris. After a workout, Chuck Norris rubs his muscles down with liquid-hot MAGMA."