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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a tease, a love, and a lust? Spit, swallow, gargle."

"I was out of tanning oil once, so I used PAM Cooking Spray. The tan didn't stick."

"What time does Sean Connery go to the US Open? Tennish"

"What did the French biologist say to visitors entering the corn maze Enjoy Zea maize!"

"Why didn't anyone care about the circus? Because it was irr-elephant"

"I've dated a vegetarian, trust me, they put meat in their mouth."

"I like to wipe my ass like I drive. Stopping only on red."

"I've just started a band called 999 Megabytes. We haven't done a gig yet."

"What do you call the mercury mine? Hg wells"

"What's the difference between toilet paper and toast? Toast is brown on both sides."