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Joke of the Day

"My mother said today, ""I'm always alright as long as I'm taking that D."" She was referring to vitamin D."

"Why can't watermelons get married? Because they cantaloupe!"

"Rabbits in a row. What do you get when 100 rabbits stand in a row and 99 take a step back? A receding hare line."

"A man was about to jump off the Empire State Building... A physicist runs up to him and shouts ""Don't do it you have so much potential!"""

"A Racist, a viciously jealous wife and a socialist walk into a room... Welcome to the US General election debate!"

"Friends invited me to a meteor shower party, but I couldn't make it. They were crushed."

"TIL that DNA originally stood for National Dyslexic Association"

"Last night I had sex with not one, not two, but zero people."

"When will Cameron stop fucking with the system? when pigs fly"

"Do you want to know where the best place to buy drugs is? High Street of course!"