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Joke of the Day

"France beat the Germans 2-0 but the terrorists have them at like 50-3"

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"What do you call a funny jar of mayonnaise? Lmayo!"
"What do you call a group of poor homeless people that show up to a party? Party paupers"
"Waiter: black pepper? Me: sure Waiter: say when Me: [remembering I have large investments in numerous peppercorn plantations] haha sure"
"Hey baby do you build portable wienerschnitzels? Because you make my hotdog stand"
"Checking the meats at my local Tesco... I looked for the burgers but it looks like they are *NEIGGHHH*-ver selling them again."
"Interviewer: what's your greatest weakness? Me: I'm always very honest. Interviewer: I don't think that's a weakness. Me: I don't give a fuck what you think."
"What do you call someone with no body and just a nose ? Nobody knows"
"If a giant talking rabbit were trying to steal my cereal, I'd probably be too busy screaming and stabbing to call him ""silly."""
"I heard that comedians never tell jokes about the Jonestown massacre. The punchline is too long."