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Joke of the Day

"You can't live on Cheetos and Oreos alone. But God knows I've tried."

"What is Batman's least favorite Sex Act? The Pearl Necklace."

"i just realized there are more toes in the world than people"

"I go for chubby girls because they can't run away"

"What will they now call a dust-up in the LGBT community (wait for it ... wait for it ) a bruhaha, of course"

"It was a rude awakening when I woke up and realized all my favorite porn stars were at least 4 years younger than me. Turning 16 sucked. =/"

"Do you whats amazing? Spiderman"

"Today I went to an Indian restaurant and asked for bread They told me they had naan."

"I went to a psychic today. Ended up accidentally breaking her crystal ball. It cost me a fortune."

"Tough break for cows. They're filled with delicious meat and covered in leather. How are we supposed to not kill them?"