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Joke of the Day

"What do actuaries do to liven up their office party? Invite an accountant."

"You can't run through a campground... you can only ran, because it's past tents."

"My life has been going round in circles recently. I'm starting to think that my wheelchair is faulty."

"Restaurant A friend said she heard there's a wonderful restaurant on the moon, but nobody goes there because there's no atmosphere..."

"Hippies say the darndest things... What did the hippy say when he was told to get off the couch and get a job? Namaste (pronounced:nah I'ma stay)"

"What did the Bra say to the Hat? You go on ahead and I'll give these two a lift."

"What are the three quickest ways of spreading a rumour (or gossip) Telegram Telephone Tell a woman Perhaps not very politically correct in the times we live in, but worth a slight chuckle."

"""Mom, I hate the word, 'Hemorrhoid'. It's like a weird planet. Hi,I'm Hemorroidian! Or oh no! A hemorrhoid is headed 4 Earth!"" -my 12yr old"

"One of the most romantic things a rose can do for another rose is leave a trail of human body parts from the front door to the bedroom."

"What do sex in a canoe and American beer have in common? They're both fucking close to water"