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Joke of the Day

"Plans are already underway for a Trump Library... It's the first time a Presidential library will have *just* scratch and sniff books."

"Whenever I write out my alimony payment, I put cute things on the memo. Like ""for your next divorce"" or ""clothes that make you feel skinny""."

"Dogs that belong to homeless people must think ""just say you're sorry dude and we can sleep inside tonight"""

"What do you give the guy who has everything? Penicillin"

"My wife told me to give her 12 inches and make it hurt So I punched her in the face and fucked her twice. Har har har"

"Dad please dont mess my hair up and say love ya' in public, I'm in a gang now"

"Q: What do snake charmers do in the rain? A: Turn on their windshield vipers."

"Today, I went to the toilet without bringing my phone. There are 178 tiles in the bathroom all and 6 stalls in total."

"Why is Hitler's Favorite Animal the Cheetah? Because they are the Facist animals within existence."

"I'm no longer with a girl because she lied about her weight. She died in a bungee jumping accident."