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Joke of the Day

"[blood bank] Doc inserts needle [turns around] YOU AGAIN! [vampire sucking on tube like straw] GO ON SCOOT [chases him from room with broom]"

"I'm a failure as a sociopath. I'm just not very good at manipulating and taking advantage of people. I'm more of a so-sopath."

"How do they say ""fuck you"" in Los Angeles? ""Trust me."""

"Why did Barbie never get pregnant? Because Ken came in a different box. Badum tiss."

"How do you make a redditor... Click on a post?"

"[Mad scientist lamenting] ""All that work, trying to create a perfect palindrome ..wasted! DAMMIT I'M MAD !"" (Pauses) ""Hey...wait"

"Did you guys know that diarrhea is genetic? It runs in your jeans."

"How many IT people does it take to change a light bulb? They don't have to change the light bulb, they buy LED's.....My first original joke submitted to reddit! Hope you like :)"

"So I finally figured out how click bait works..."

"math problem that didn't stump the internet 2 girls 1 cup"