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Joke of the Day

"Hi we're a group of teens who solve mysteries! We wanna be taken seriously so we wrote a theme song about how we can't ever find our dog."

"My relationship is complex. I'm try to keep it real but my girlfriend is imaginary."

"[getting murdered] Me: ""Could you please stop for a second?"" *gives murderer a Snickers"

"How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Zero, they will just beat the room for being black."

"I have no idea how I use to get around in the dark before I had a cell phone."

"Two terrorists are sittign around a campfire..... when all of a sudden a donkey comes along.. The first terrorist jumps up and shouts "" Look at that ass!"""

"a white girl slowly crawls out of her ugg castle, ""it's almost pumpkin spice time"" she growls as she sniffs the air."

"What came in the mail today? Anthrax."

"If this gets 1000 upvotes, my wife and I will try anal... Please don't, her strap on is huge"

"My sister and I decided that we want to start our own businesses. She's going to open a furniture store called 'Sofa King' and I'm going to open a soup restaurant next door called 'Stew Pit'."