58924

Joke of the Day

"Me I'm a joke."

"Milk cartons in Asia have missing planes on them instead of children."

"Since the presidential race has literally a dick measuring contest... who would win the election if the election is decided by dick measurements? Hillary Clinton of course!"

"I USED MY WIFE'S VOLUMIZING SHAMPOO AND NOW I CAN'T STOP YELLING!"

"Term for the Useless I have a buddy that is on unemployment and disability at the same time... I call it unability!"

"What do you call an angry Russian? Pissdov"

"In the Chinese version of ""Fight Club"" the main character thought he had befriended a crazy anarchist. Turns out he was Wong the whole time."

"What's the most trifling thing about divorce when you have kids? Child custardy"

"A recent study shows 50% of people think that people who can't spell are idiots .. The other 50% said ""that's ridiclious!"""

"My buddy's autistic twin brother has a seizure while on a camping trip, causing my buddy to miss his first day on the job at Dominoes. ""Tell the manager your brother had a Little Caesar"""