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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen"
Next Joke
"What made Bruce decide against Jacqueline for his new name? He was afraid his nickname would be Jockie."
"The only meal my girlfriend ever makes for me is alphabet soup because even when we aren't fighting she still loves to put words in my mouth"
"If you're only18, please don't tweet philosophy and proverb verbiage based on your first love and the difficulty of your inexperienced life."
"STDs are like pokemons... To be cool, you gotta catch 'em all."
"Stop being racist to kettles."
"Wife. I'm going to bed. Me. Nooo! Don't leave me alone with the fridge."
"Alcohol is like Lysol for feelings, it won't kill all of them."
"That awkward moment when you check the price tag and then slowly walk away."
"What do you get if you cross a bird with a monstrous snarl? A budgerigrrrrr!"