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Joke of the Day

"Four years ago I asked a girl out on a date and today I asked her to marry me. She said no both times."

"Which of the Himalayas is the shortest?"

"""You know what would make a good gift for this 3yr old? A harmonica."" - people without kids"

"Physicist Frank Wilczek states that there is life on other planets... Profesor Stephen Hawking maintains his position."

"Q: Why did the blonde have a hysterectomy? A: She wanted to stop having grandchildren."

"I bought a book yesterday: ""101 Uses For Binary"". However, when I got home I was very disappointed to find it only contained five."

"A sober Irishman arrives goes home after work... That's it."

"Chihuahuas are a lot like farts... ...only their owners can stand them."

"I went to Penn State as a tight end. I left as a wide receiver."

"What does a man often wake with, but can never go to sleep with? An alarm, you pervert!"