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Joke of the Day
"""Wish You Were Beer!"" Wait...no...that's right...send."
Next Joke
"Me: My dog ran away two days ago Dog pound: Does he have a tag? Me [covers phone to ask wife]: Is the dog on Instagram?"
"What's the difference between a Hummer and a cactus? A cactus has all the pricks on the outside."
"If H20 is on the inside of fire hydrants, what is on the outside? K9P."
"It's me Goan Goan who?...... Goan fuck yourself"
"What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied? Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!"
"While it's true that gay marriage doesn't nullify straight marriage, if Beyonce was born on your birthday it's not your birthday anymore."
"What's a a magician's favorite kind of coffee? 100% abracadabra"
"Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands! You're welcome."
"How many tickles does a Japanese school girl want? Tentickles."