58201

Joke of the Day

"A black guy walks into a bar with a beautiful parrot on his shoulder. ""Wow,"" says the bartender. ""That is really something. Where'd you get it?"" ""Africa,"" says the parrot."

"So then someone told me Islam is the religion of peace."

"What did the fireman say when the church caught on fire? ""Holy smoke!"""

"Aren't you glad you no longer have that ""Call Me Maybe"" song in your head? Oops. Sorry. #SoCallMeMaybe!"

"The rest of you just need to get fat because I don't feel like going to the gym anymore..."

"My girlfriend needs an abortion.... And Mexico is gonna pay for it."

"Where do twin lesbians meet up? A Clone Dyke Bar."

"Did you know that if you laid the entirety of my intestines out in a straight line you'd likely be incarcerated for many years?"

"*wakes up in cold sweat* SHOULDN'T ELEVATORS BE CALLED SOMETHING ELSE ON THE WAY DOWN?"

"Did you hear about the cookie that was litterally made of nothing but grass and dirt? it was a real tuft cookie"