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Joke of the Day

"Three Jews walk into a bar... ...and head straight to the back room to check the books to see how much profit it's been making. Because they own the bar. Because they're Jews."

"If a Republican candidate who is hated by the GOP establishment and loathed by half the country just won the election... ...maybe Hillary should consider running as a Republican!"

"Sometimes I feel like I've traveled back in time, and that I'm not supposed to do anything that screws up a future that I've forgotten."

"What do an uncircumcised penis and the kkk have in common? They're both pricks in oversized hoods."

"What's the difference between sand and menstrual blood? You can't drink sand."

"There are two types of people in the world. Those who understand ROT26... ...and those who don't."

"Mike Tyson is a passionate, sensitive man, who cries after making love. ...because of the mace."

"What's the problem with a Jewish football team? you're gonna need a new squad as soon as soon as they hit the showers"

"Get all the protein you can before you die because there's no whey in Hell"

"What do you call a jelly bear that died and came back? A mummy bear"