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Joke of the Day
"I wonder what Hillary Clinton will do after she dies.... Most likely she'll lie still"
Next Joke
"(pretending to be well-read to impress a girl) War and Peace? Yeah I loved that one ""What was your favorite part?"" I'd have to say the Peace"
"I like my women like I like my coffee Ground up and in the freezer."
"It has been said that 25% of people have a distrust of stairs Because they are always up to something"
"Keep yelling ""dance!"" and shooting at my feet, tough guy. I studied tap for 9 years and you're going to look like an idiot."
"""I'm sorry but it's only 7 items or less in the dressing rooms"" [octopus glove shopping] ""this is unacceptable"""
"What do you call a Tardy count for a school of water bears? A tardigrade!"
"I love when people say to me... Omg! Your so funny on FB. If they only knew about my awesome copy & paste ability..They could be just as funny!"
"Men are like mini skirts. If you're not careful they'll creep up your legs."
"When you really think about it... 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape."