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Joke of the Day

"I was caught stalking David Cameron today I told the police that I was simply following the political movement."

"Looks like Trump is going to lose the presidency I guess his erection is going cost him the election"

"The pollen is so bad this year ...that it has the addicts turning their meth back into sudafed!"

"""What's it like being a female comic?"" ""Well, you get asked what it's like being a female comic a lot."""

"Took a class at Trump University but ... ... the textbook had four Chapter 11s."

"I asked a beautiful homeless girl if I could taker her home with me. She said, ""Yes!"" With a big smile... But that quickly changed when I walked away with the cardboard box that she lived in."

"If I have 10 pieces of bacon and you take half, what do you have? That's right, a black eye and my hatred."

"Chuck Norris built a better mousetrap, but the world was too frightened to beat a path to his door."

"If the Cholera Doesn't Get Ya... Your on the Oregon Trail and you meet a man named Terry. You laugh and say ""Terry is a girls name!"" He shoots you. You have died of dissin Terry."

"Why is buying a macbook like using a high end prostitute? Because you spend more but, at least you don't get a virus"