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Joke of the Day
"Welcome, take off your pants ...and jacket."
Next Joke
"Toddlers & Ghosts -haunt you at all hours -lots of moaning/screaming -unclear motives -not helpful with housework -randomly open cupboards"
"Why did the black man walk into a bar? Because the cell door was still locked."
"Do you know who has the most home runs in MLB history? Barry Bonds... Do you know who leads the MLB in strikeouts pitched? Nolan Ryan... Do you know who has been hit by the most balls? Liberaci"
"How come Peter Pan keeps on flying? Because he Neverlands"
"My girlfriend broke up with me after I said she's half the person I am... I weigh 240 pounds, not sure why she got so mad."
"Apparently filling animals with helium is ""abuse"", pfft Whatever floats your goat, I guess."
"A crossfitter, a vegan, an atheist, and a Redditor who always exposes reposts are all sitting at a bar... and I know this because they won't shut up about it."
"It's nice that lions don't mind looking like 80's rock stars."
"Turning to an episode of Seinfeld and discovering it's one you've never seen is like finding a twenty dollar bill in your pocket."