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Joke of the Day

"Turning to an episode of Seinfeld and discovering it's one you've never seen is like finding a twenty dollar bill in your pocket."

"Researchers in Canada have reported finding a superconductor that they say works at room temperature."

"The New 20 Dollar Bill Will Only Be Worth 12 Dollars Thanks to the 3/5ths compromise."

"Your ""poetic"" tweets would be so much better if Adele hadn't thought of them first"

"So my sister attempted to commit suicide the other day and it made me so angry. I couldn't believe one of my own family members would fail at something like that."

"Did you hear about the new Die Hard where Willis Infiltrates a Corrupt Nunnery? ""*Bad Habits Die Hard.*"""

"Water-loo is such a shitty place. Just thinking about it would make me pissed, if I gave a crap."

"You said that if I went to visit at the hospital I should be sure to take flowers. So, when the nurse wasn't looking, I did."

"So how about the BBC sacking Jeremy Clarkson ? I think the whole thing is a huge miss-steak."

"John only wants to fuck virgins. He's such a cherry dicker"