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Joke of the Day

"If you told Alexander Hamilton that the online lottery to see his rap musical was unavailable due to server overload, he'd be like, ""WITCH!"""

"This hotel has the worst mini-bar. All the little bottles of booze taste like shampoo."

"I asked a friend of mine from New Zealand how many sexual partners he'd had. He started counting, but he fell asleep."

"I know it's fiction but the logic in The Walking Dead is so skewed it is impossible to suspend disbelief. An Asian guy named Glenn? Please"

"What snakes are good at sums ? Adders !"

"What do you call a gay drive by? A fruit roll up."

"A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants The bartender says, ""Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"" The pirate says, ""I don't know, but it's driving me nuts!"""

"What kind of pictures do hermit crabs take? Shellfies"

"Why cant the Rolling stones ever be pastors? We all know they dont gather mass."

"Why did the irishman wear two condoms? to be sure, to be sure."