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Joke of the Day

"How are tigers like sergeants in the army ? They both wear stripes !"

"Pete and Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out, who was left? (Really?) Pete and Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out, who was left?"

"Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together."

"Tip: ""Montreal"" is short for ""Monsters Are Real."" The city was originally given this name due to its abundance of monsters."

"What do you get if you cross an elephant with the Internet? I don't know but it's e-nourmous."

"What is something that is always heard but never seen? A member of the Queen's guard doing a single squat."

"Why can't mites race in NASCAR? Because mites make rights, not lefts."

"A man stands over the coffin of his deceased wife. ""Her star sign was cancer you know"" he says. "" I guess it's ironic..."" ""That she was killed by a giant crab."""

"I'll stop gnawing the ends off violins when they stop looking like Cinnabons."

"The worst part of seeing a spider in the shower was the way it covered it's eyes when it saw me."