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Joke of the Day

"You don't have to study for a pregnancy test... but I have heard there's a lot of cramming that goes on before the exam."

"I laugh like a dumbass every time I hear the term 'manhole'. Maturity will not be reached."

"[at my funeral] So young, how did he die? He ran into oncoming traffic after walking past a group of adults saying the word ""bae"""

"What do gay horses eat? Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!"

"I'm busy masturbating when my friend texts me ""What's up?"" With my free hand I text ""Nuttin'"""

"What do you call the poop that won't wipe away from your ass? You little piece of shit"

"Most of us get into advertising for the money. Me? I've just always had a passion for making people feel bad"

"Let us not judge a man based on the color of his skin, but by which character he picks in Super Smash Bros."

"Two bananas are relaxing on a river bank... When a turd floats by. The turd shouts over. ""Come on in the waters great."" One banana turns to the other and says. ""Do you believe this shit."""

"I saw a sign today about lost cat Missing cat: Wanted dead and alive If found return to Schrodinger"