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Joke of the Day

"What do college fish study? Algae brah... I know it sucks but it was the only joke I've ever come up with!"

"You'd think that when two atoms in a salt bond, they're being kind by sharing electrons, but actually, one atom is stealing the electron from the other. Isn't it ionic?"

"Why wouldn't Chad Kroeger (lead singer of Nickelback) have sex with Helen Keller? Because she's a woman!"

"Onions are a lot like knives.... If you get them in your eye you'll probably cry"

"I hope when the machines take over the world they start by fixing my cable."

"I said to my Doctor, ""I've become a can of deodorant."" He said, ""Are you sure?"" I replied, ""No, I'm Lynx."""

"Vanilla Ice should be President If there's a problem, yo, he'll solve it."

"What's Nigel Thornberry's favorite band? The Smashing Pumpkins."

"Mexican jokes and black jokes are pretty much the same. Once you hear Juan you've heard Jamal."

"Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverlands. This is always funny because it never grows old"