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Joke of the Day

"The ghost teacher was showing her class how to walk through walls. ""Now did all of you understand that?"" she asked. ""If not, I'll just go through it again."""

Next Joke
 
"Gotta admire the Nazi's ethics on medical research... ...since they advanced the field without hurting any animals."
"A kid came to my door last night for trick-or-treat dressed as a pirate... I asked him, ""where are your buckaneers?"" He replied, ""on the side of my buck'en head."""
"Men and women stalk differently. Men will drive by at night. Women will show up at your job and smash your stuff in front of everyone."
"What do you call an aging actor who has finally paid off his house? Mortgage freeman."
"How do mermaids give birth? Via Sea-Section"
"DATING TIP: Be a gentleman. Hold her door. Hold her hand. Hold her purse. Hold her for ransom. Demand a chopper. Fly away. Start a new life."
"PATIENT: Since I got this new job my feet are killing me. DR DOG: What's your job? PATIENT: Mailman DR DOG: *chases him out of room barking*"
"Did the girl ever go to the whore Olympics? Nah, she couldn't be fucked."
"When I see a ""How am I driving?"" sticker, I want to take the driver in my arms and tell them that I too have questions about my existence"