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Joke of the Day

"You know the kids that'd knock on doors and run away....? ...they now deliver stuff for UPS"

"How is my sex life like a Ferrari? Imported and extremely expensive."

"I wonder how many hobbies you have to suck at before you take up bird watching."

"Why is it so hard to get into a relationship with an SJW? Because they have high double standards."

"""Give it to me!! I'm so fucking wet!"" She screamed at me... ""Fuck off. This is MY umbrella."""

"My grandfather died at Auschwitz He got drunk and fell out of a guard tower"

"Google+ is the gym of social networking. We all join, but nobody actually uses it."

"What does 80 year-old pussy taste like? Depends..."

"Why do Russians celebrate Christmas on the 7th of January? Cause eight reindeer and a sleigh are a lot quicker than 6 pigs and a stoneboat."

"I asked a frenchman what his favorite game console was I don't think he understood me though, he just replied ""oui""."