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Joke of the Day

"[Donald Duck opens gift] Daisy: It's pants. Try them on! Donald: [stands] STOP TRYING TO CHANGE ME WOMAN"

"The Constipated Mathematician What did the constipated mathematician do? He worked it out with a pencil."

"I'm surprised the Pope didn't tweet from an Android, considering humanity and God's experience with apples."

"We're like lazy revolutionaries who act only by posting lame comments on a public forum."

"I asked my wife what my rapper name should be. She suggested, ""2-PAAQ"" 2 pumps and a quiver. :'("

"What do you call a magic door? Dumbledoor!"

"While on duty, a police officer comes across an injured baby horse. The cause of the injury unknown, but the officer suspects foal play."

"When people say ""You can fit a million earths in the sun!!!"" I'm like: Hey. Maybe we shouldnt put any earths in the sun. The sun is hot."

"Socialism jokes are only funny if everybody gets them. Its Reality."

"I just invented a new word. Plagiarism."