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Joke of the Day

"My Obgyn suggested I cut carbs to maintain a healthier pregnancy weight. Frankly, I'd rather cut the Obgyn."

"Narcolepsy is the sluttiest neurological disorder."

"Why was epsilon afraid of zeta? Because zeta eta theta."

"Is it cocky to have more than one penis? I think it's two cocky."

"How do you get a Baby to Stop crying? You Beat it with a brick"

"What do soy products and a vibrator have in common? The both substitute meat"

"What did the mama bison say to her son when he went off to college Bison. :> get it?"

"The only upside to Trump's big wall is that Texas will finally get some of Banksy's Art. Maybe like a little girl and a soldier with a gun"

"What do you always get on your birthday? Another year older!birt"

"(confronts Beck in line at Jamba Juice, holds up hurried sketch of Beyonce, aggressively does ""Single Ladies"" dance)"