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Joke of the Day
"Just ate two bacon cheeseburgers, so if anyone wants to come rob me, I won't be getting up."
Next Joke
"Every time your kid starts crying when they don't get what they want, just say ""I don't negotiate with terrorists."""
"If you're heartbroken, remember: There are plenty of fish in the sea. But I'd advise giving mankind another chance first."
"Dont look at my username. You looked, dint you? Dint I tell you not to? Dont you have any control? ANY control? You stoopid?.... Get it?"
"Why did the farmer name his pig ""pork Chop"" Because 'Bacon' was already taken."
"Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered six offender"
"Son: What is an autobiography? Father: Er the story of an automobile."
"David Bowie died at 69, Alan Rickman died at 69... ... Donald Trump is 69. We are all crossing our fingers."
"What's the difference between a refugee and E.T? E.T learned English and wanted to go home"
"My mate went to a fancy dress party as a silent bee. ""Very subtle,"" I thought."