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Joke of the Day

"Jennifer Aniston named Sexiest Woman of All Time by Men's Health. Men's Health named Craziest Magazine of All Time by Men's Mental Health."

"there should be a jail just for people that don't break apart kit kats before they eat them"

"What's the difference between a garbanzo and a chickpea? Trump has never had a garbanzo on his face."

"I had a dream I was a muffler I woke up exhausted."

"[At Neiman Marcus] *looks at sales clerk* *holds up a Prada and a Burberry briefcase* I don't know...which one will hold more chicken nuggets?"

"Two blondes stood on a riverbank across one another... One blonde yells out, ""How do I get to the other side?"" The other blonde replies, ""You ARE on the other side!"""

"What comes out of a reasonable volcano? Pragma."

"Knock knock... Who's there? Dunup Dunup who?"

"Where do the Japanese store defective mannequin feet? In bent-toe boxes."

"What did one cell say to his sister cell that stepped on his toe? Mitosis!"