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Joke of the Day
"Drugs can help you land a girl. You just have to make sure to pour them in the right drink"
Next Joke
"What are ISIS militants using to stuff their Thanksgiving goat? Their dicks!"
"A ship carrying blue paint has collided with a ship carrying red paint in the English Channel. 32 sailors have been marooned"
"*hitler leans in close to the mic* and the next person to question me gets executioned *grammar nazi bites lip*"
"Tinfoil: Viserys Targaryen is a hipster. He wore a crown before it was cool."
"What did the lawyer say to the sovereign citizen when asked for legal counsel? **Am I being retained?** **Am I being retained?**"
"If Twitter icons have taught me anything it's that the male eye can spot cleavage at incredibly low resolutions."
"All I'm saying is, China could have a much better relationship with the West if they shared their dragons with us but whatever be that way."
"I had sex with a prostitute in a clown costume before Stephen King wrote that horror novel. In a pro pre-It."
"Does anybody know what date Easter is this year? And if so, what are you, obsessed with Easter"