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Joke of the Day

"Also, those little Swiss Army knives are great when you need a tiny pair of scissors to open your Gummi Bears like some kind of crack head."

"Every chick magazine ever: You're beautiful and are perfect just the way you are! How to loose ten pounds in ten days you fat, ugly cow."

"There's a lot of Arab new mothers lately This must be the new baby boom!"

"I went to visit my grandfather in the hospital, but it was too late... He was already gone. His suffering is over now. He's gone home. He's doing much better, so the hospital discharged him!"

"awesome jokes guys keep em coming As a single father, I love browsing this subreddit so when I see my wifes kids once a month I have a lot of epic jokes to tell them. Keep em coming!"

"Found the cause of the Fort McMurray fires.. My mix tape just dropped"

"Why do husbands die before their wives? They want to."

"Didja hear an LGBT singer just came out with a cover of that Santana Grammy-winner from a few years back? It's called ""Brooth"""

"Well kids, when a man and woman love each other very much, he erects a monument for her, but in his pants."

"What did the hippie say when he was asked to leave the party? ""Namaste"""