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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a black persons toe? Ghetto"

"I tried to eat soup with a fork. It was a strain."

"I met a guy who said he could get a great deal on a pillowcase... turns out, it was a sham."

"A jokey named Chris is running late for his race... ...his coach points at his horse and yells ""Chris top her"" Edit: Spelling"

"The gardener asked me what I wanted him to do, I told him to water the plants... He points and asks ""water these?"", I said ""nah man, *pointing* WATER THOSE""."

"my girlfriend must feel the same way about pizza as she feels about sex. if she has it one night, she won't want it again for a few weeks."

"dentist was flossing my teeth & said ""they're very tight"" & I said ""yeah they're homies"" & he laughed so loud that it made me uncomfortable"

"How many women does it take to park a car? A man."

"Hillary was shown a video of her flip-flopping on issues all over her career. At first, she was upset. Now she says she's ok with it."

"My first time doing standup was a lot like my first time having sex. I finished way too early and when it was over I couldn't stop apologizing."