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Joke of the Day

"I recently saw a documentary on different types of stationery throughout history. It was on paper-view."

"What is the average lifespan of an owl? A little over 6 books."

"I got hit by a car today, guys. Don't worry. I'm okay. It just grazed me, ripped my cargo pants pocket clean off, egg rolls everywhere."

"Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by up to 90%. - It's called wedding cake."

"What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer"

"Raise your hand if this is your first time under a helicopter. Ah, sorry to make an example of you Johnson, but that's why we never do that."

"How does a mathematical pedophile refer to a child who just turned 8 years old? As someone who has passed their prime."

"Who's this Rorschach guy... And why does he paint so many penises?"

"It is tough to do inventories in Afghanistan because of the tally ban."

"A Three legged dog walks into the old wild west saloon He says to the bartender, ""I'm lookin' fer the guy who shot my paw."""