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Joke of the Day
"Religions are like farts... Everyone likes their own but thinks all the others stink."
Next Joke
"My goal weight is for it not to look like I'm having a stroke when I yawn."
"All I want from life is to be able to respond ""crystal"" when someone angrily asks me if they've made themselves clear."
"Why are white people bad at chess? They think all the white pieces are kings."
"How are woman and tornadoes alike? They both moan like hell when they come and take the house when they leave."
"[date] Her: so you're a mathematician? Me: no actually I'm a *pythagorean doves fly out of my sleeve and hit her in the face* mathemagician"
"Knock Knock Who's there? The Pilot. Let me in."
"What do you call an injured Confederate soldier that can't find a medic? A rebel without a gauze."
"Holding my breath until someone likes this status."
"What does a lingerie store and a guitar store have in common? They both sell G-strings"