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Joke of the Day

"Seven dwarves... sitting in a bath and they all felt happy. Happy got out and they all felt grumpy."

"Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 89% water. I can walk on babies. I am... in jail."

"I really don't know how to put this but I think I am allergic either to peanut butter or dog saliva."

"Would I miss my leg or my arm more? (me, lying in bed, deciding which to put outside the blanket for the monster under the bed to rip off)"

"Gravity is such a slut She goes down on everything"

"Jehovah Witnesses keep coming to my house... So today I decided to answer the door naked and... Well...I solved the Girl Scout problem...."

"How often does Mary see her special friend? Periodically."

"5 birds are on a fence, you shoot one, how many are left. None they all flew away."

"My secret ingredient is letting somebody else cook."

"Why did Hitler kill himself? He got his gas bill."