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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the midget psychic who escaped prison? He was a small medium at large."

"www.reddit.com See Above."

"I got 99 problems but I'm avoiding them all."

"cop: are you high? me: if i was high could i do this? *vaults over car hood and does 360 no scope* cop: did you just say ""asterisk vaults ov"

"You know what Nixon did wrong? He only broke into the watergate hotel once. He should have done it everyday. Then it would have been normal. Yes, you got it, jokes on you."

"Why do robots make bad lovers? Nuts & bolts!"

"Ice cream is clearly God's way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby."

"Apple is going to release the first smart vacuum cleaner this year The first Apple product that doesn't suck (not hating on apple or anything but i got this joke somewhere)"

"What I hated the most in Facebook? . . . . . . . See more"

"wife: im sick of him jeopardizing our marriage therapist: how do you respond to that kyle? me: ill take susan is being a huge baby for $600"