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Joke of the Day

"some girls give each other the emptiest compliments I've ever heard ""aww babe ur just omg like I can't"" wtf did you just say??"

"Always wanted to call people who don't like astronomy ""Galactos Intolerant"""

"All I want to know is why Antonio Banderas' hair has been wet for 20 years."

"Ghostbusters is my favorite movie where Bill Murray yells at a giant marshmallow man for stepping on a church."

"What kind of company is a 24 hours hamburger joint? Fry-by-night!"

"A Blind Man Walks Into A Bar Then Into a Table, Then Into A Bar Stool......."

"What do werewolves put at the bottom of their e-mails? Beast wishes."

"A Scotsman walks into a bar.... There is usually an Englishman, an Irishman and a Welshman, but they're all still in France :("

"Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear."

"I dont pretend to be anything I'm not.. Except for sober I've pretended to be sober a few times"