52503

Joke of the Day

"What's the name of that band Dave Matthews is in"

"What do you do if you fiend King Kong in the kitchen? Just don't monkey with him."

"My youngest son can now reach the light switches, so don't come over to my house, unless you're really into raves or want to have a seizure."

"Some people say that The Big Bang Theory disproves God... I mean, sure, it's not the best show, but I wouldn't go *that* far."

"What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? The hooker can wash her crack and sell it again."

"I want to see a pregnancy test commercial where 2 single people high five the shit out of each other because it's negative."

"If you're class of 2020.... then you must have a vision for the future."

"If those Amazon drones can really get to your house in 30 minutes then condoms are about to become their #1 selling item."

"How does an Alabama girl know she's in for a crazy night? Her daddy says he wants her in bed by ten."

"What do you get if you cross a cow with an octopus ? A cow that can milk itself !"