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Joke of the Day

"""Dad, did you ever fall in love with a teacher?"" ""Yes son , with the kindergarden teacher."" ""Then what happened?"" ""Well, your mom caught us and we had to send you to a new school."""

"Read out loud for full affect * ""Knock knock"" * ""Who's there"" * ""I eat mop"" * ""I eat mop who"" * *que laughter Gets em every time"

"You say tomato. I say tomato. Our eyes meet. We've decided on the perfect name for our baby"

"Where does the president keep his armies? In his sleevies"

"What type of fruit is impossible to marry? Cantaloupe"

"What did the reverend say before eating his salad? Lettuce Pray."

"4-yr-old saw picture of me pregnant. I explain that she was inside me. She thought for a bit then said: ""I never want to do that again."""

"So Boxing Day, its a magical time of year, when companies send you amazing emails with pictures of all the stuff you just brought from them, at half price."

"Anheuser Busch is using a Georgia brewery to can water for flood victims in Oklahoma and Texas They're labeling very clearly so people don't confuse it with Bud Light"

"Teacher My teacher pointed to me with the ruler and said ""There is an idiot at the end of the ruler"" I got suspended for asking which end! :P"