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Joke of the Day
"Being an assassin would be so cool People would kill to have that job"
Next Joke
"It's hard to trust humans; even the blind prefer to be guided by dogs."
"If a duck and a elephant were to vote They'd vote for donald trunk"
"Q: Why was Heisenberg such a bad lover? A: When he got the momentum, he couldn't find the position, and when he found the position, he couldn't muster up the momentum. **X-post : /r/ScienceHumour**"
"If you've ever watched a butcher wrap pork chops, you've seen me wrapping Christmas presents."
"How are woman and tornadoes alike? They both moan like hell when they come and take the house when they leave."
"What's another word for cinnamon? Synonym."
"They could of at least added a middle finger emoji on iOS7."
"What US city has the dirtiest waffles? San Diego"
"An electrician comes home at 2 am.... His wife asks, ""wire you insulate?"" He replies, ""watt's the problem, I'm ohm aren't I?"""