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Joke of the Day

"A farmer's cattle broke out of their pen and got into the marijuana plants he was growing. The steaks were really high."

"Whenever a long lost friend calls me, I get suspicious & wonder if he's calling me to sell Amway products.."

"If somebody stops to ask me directions, I give them directions to my house. see you in twenty minutes new best friend."

"A dan walked into a barr. And Roseanne said watch where you are going!"

"What do you call a sexually repressed bandit? Rubbin' Hood"

"Just went down to get my driver's license renewed but this time I made sure I was drunk for the picture. Now if I ever get pulled over for drunk driving, they'll just think I'm spastic."

"The best thing about algebra in high school is that it's in high school and I'm not."

"Snake and the lizard Did you hear about the snake and lizard? Turns out they moved. Yeah, they scored an upscale apartment."

"What do you call a Jewish man, mid ejaculation? A Heblew."

"What's the difference between public hair and pubic hair? Pants."