51061

Joke of the Day

"*Spends 30 min practicing Starbucks order in mirror* *Feels confident* *""Hi I'd like a grander ahoy Ralph Macchioatto lateenbay""* *dammit*"

"I really could use some steroids. My balls are just way too big."

"Why do people go to bed? Because the bed won't come to them."

"What does Shakespeare's dog eat? Iambs!"

"7 out of 10 people believe in Life after death. The other 3 don't even like cereal."

"I'm here to tell you the truth about Trump voters! [deluded]"

"Jesus Sure jesus fed 2000 people with fish, but hitler made 6million jews toast."

"What do terrorists eat when its sunny? Choc-ISIS"

"Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go."

"Archimedes law of bathing When your body immersed in water, the phone rings"