50990

Joke of the Day

"What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt"

"I am not the kind of girl you can take home to your wife."

"Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's fine, he woke up."

"According to Ron Burgundy... According to Ron Burgundy from *Anchorman*, people from San Diago are known as Sandiagons. Then what are people from Tampa called?"

"The problem with cuddling in bed with your true love is that iPhones don't cuddle back."

"That tornado damage your cow barn any? Dunno. Haven't found the durn thing yet!"

"I thought we had the right to bear arms but when I got them I was arrested for animal abuse"

"I had a brain scan, and the results were negative. The doctors couldn't find a brain."

" My friend's dog died the other day so I surprised her by going out and getting her an identical dog. She was furious, she said *""what am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?""*"

"Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and smell bad."