50550

Joke of the Day

"Why is Yoda the worst copilot? ""Yoda, are we still going the right way?"" ""Off course we are"""

"I treasure my watch. This is my grandfather, who sold it to me on his deathbed."

"What do you call two crows standing side by side? Attempted murder."

"I went for sushi with Luke Skywalker and he was struggling with chopsticks... ""Use the fork, Luke!"" I said."

"If you don't hate yourself by the time you log off, you're not using the internet correctly."

"man walks into lawyer's office. ""How much for a consultation?"" ""Three questions for $150 bucks."" ""Kinda steep, isn't it?"" ""Yeah, now what's your last question."""

"A: ""What is the integral of 1/cabin?"" B: ""Log cabin!"" A: ""Nope, Houseboat. You forgot the C."""

"I'm abandoning Obamacare for Bidencare. Everyone gets a sixer of Natty Light, 2 copies of Hustler from 1978 and a VHS copy of Caddyshack."

"What do you call someone from Massachusetts who murders a bunch of Catholics? A Mass. Mass Mass Murderer."

"I wanted to hire a marsupial butler... but none of the applicants were koala-fied."